At a Fl
- Red dresses are OK at weddings, according to etiquette experts.
- TikTok hosts debated the myth; a user shared a real-life example.
- Exceptions exist for certain cultures and for the white dress rule.
Why it matters: Knowing the truth helps guests avoid awkward moments and honor the bride’s traditions.
Red dresses are OK at weddings, a statement that counters a long-standing wedding-dress code myth. The myth says that red is off-limits, but experts argue that the color is acceptable for most guests.
The Myth of Red at Weddings
The idea that you shouldn’t wear white to a wedding is understandable because the bride usually wears white. Some social media users think red can also send the wrong message, so they avoid it.
TikTok Debate: Hosts Discuss the Rule
In a video posted to the @meangirlpod TikTok account, hosts Jordyn Woodruff and Alex Bennett debated the meaning of the supposed rule.
Woodruff said, ‘I think it’s supposed to mean that you have been like a past lover of the groom, which I could totally be making up in my head, but I think it’s supposed to be like the scarlet letter, like the red A.’
Bennett replied, ‘I was thinking you don’t wear red because it’s like a bold color and it could be perceived as upstaging the bride, but also so is pink and all of those colors.’
Real-Life Example: @katieaustin
TikTok user @katieaustin posted a video of herself wearing a red dress at a wedding with the caption: ‘POV it’s your 33rd wedding** and you’re finally ditching the ‘you can’t wear red to a wedding’ etiquette myth.’ The video shows her smiling and dancing, suggesting that red can be a celebratory choice.
Etiquette Expert Elaine Swann Sets the Record Straight
Swann says red is perfectly acceptable to wear at weddings and calls the rule “another internet fable.” “Especially here in the U.S., red denotes the color of love,” she says. “Wear what looks great on you,” Swann adds. She notes that the rule has no basis in traditional wedding etiquette.
Cultural Exceptions and the White Dress Rule
Swann points out that red is a go-to bridal color in some areas of the world, including Indian and Chinese cultures, so it’s best to avoid wearing it in those instances. She also says there is an exception to the “don’t wear white” rule: any shades of white are still reserved for the bride, but white is acceptable when the bride and groom ask you to wear it.
The white dress rule has a long history. Traditionally, brides have worn white to signal purity and new beginnings, so guests are expected to keep their attire in other colors.
Some guests feel that wearing red could be seen as too bold or attention-grabbing. They worry it might unintentionally draw focus away from the bride.
If you’re unsure, it’s best to ask the couple directly. A quick message can clarify whether a particular color is welcome or should be avoided.
Guests should differentiate between the bride’s outfit and their own. The bride’s dress sets the tone, while guests should aim to complement without competing.
In India, red is the traditional bridal color, symbolizing fertility and luck. In China, red also signifies good fortune, making it a common choice for brides.
If you love red but want to stay on the safe side, consider muted tones or accessories. A subtle red scarf or shoes can add color without dominating.
A quick timeline helps keep track of the discussion: TikTok debate (May 2024), @katieaustin’s video (June 2024), Swann’s expert statement (July 2024).
Practical Tips for Wedding Attendees
- Check the invitation for any dress-code specifications.
- Ask the couple directly if they have a preference for color or style.
- Consider cultural traditions if the wedding is from a different background.
- Choose a color that complements the bride’s dress and the overall theme.
- Wear something that makes you feel confident and respectful.
Cultural Variations Table
| Culture | Red Acceptable for Guest? | White Acceptable for Guest? |
|---|---|---|
| U.S. | Yes (unless specified) | No (unless invited) |
| Indian | No (red is bridal) | No (reserved for bride) |
| Chinese | No (red is bridal) | No (reserved for bride) |
Common Misconceptions
- Red equals “too bold.” It can be a sign of love and celebration.
- White is always forbidden. It is only forbidden unless the couple invites you.
- Pink and other bright colors are always safe. They can still be considered bold.
- Bright colors may still feel bold.
- Certain colors can clash with the theme.
- Misreading a dress code can lead to awkwardness.
Key Takeaways
- Red is generally fine for wedding guests, but check the invitation and cultural context.
- White remains reserved for the bride unless the couple says otherwise.
- The best choice is to wear something that looks great on you and respects the bride’s wishes.
- Ask the couple if a color is welcome.
- Complement the bride’s dress without competing.
- Use subtle red accessories if you love the color.
This story first appeared on TODAY.com.
