> At a Glance
> – A U.K. woman posted on Mumsnet that sharing a bed with her husband has “become torture”
> – She cites his snoring, fidgeting, late-night coffee habit, and 5 a.m. alarm as sleep destroyers
> – Commenters overwhelmingly back her request for separate beds, citing their own relief
> – Why it matters: Sleeplessness is harming her daytime alertness, and readers debate whether separate beds help or hurt marriages
A Mumsnet user’s late-night confession-she loves her husband but can’t stand sleeping next to him-has struck a chord with thousands, spotlighting the taboo topic of couples opting for separate beds.
Midnight Misery
The anonymous poster says her spouse’s aching shoulder causes constant fidgeting, while loud snores and flatulence keep her awake. He also rises repeatedly to use the bathroom, flipping on the light each time, and downs mugs of coffee right up until bedtime despite her requests to cut back.
Add a 5 a.m. alarm he snoozes repeatedly, and she’s left exhausted:
- Nudged in the back to roll over
- Duvet yanked off or piled on when he overheats
- Woken up most mornings long before she needs to rise
The fatigue, she writes, is “beginning to affect my alertness, and I’m fighting to stay awake in the day.”
Forum Frenzy
Responses poured in urging her to prioritize rest over politeness. One bluntly advises, “I wouldn’t give two hoots about his feelings… he obviously has no regard for yours.” Others share success stories:
> “Separate bedrooms [are] quite honestly the best thing we ever did. Neither of us would go back to sharing.”
A compromise suggestion: share a bed a couple nights a week if she wants to soften the blow.
Key Takeaways
- Broken sleep is affecting the woman’s health and daily functioning
- Mumsnet users overwhelmingly support separate beds over silent suffering
- Many couples report stronger relationships after moving to separate rooms
- Communication, not co-sleeping, may be the real key to marital harmony
The thread closes with her still mustering courage to ask for a “sleep divorce,” proving the hardest part can be broaching the subject, not finding an extra pillow.
